Why You Cannot Keep a Promise

The article was provided by online dating site

People who have problems with keeping a promise, not only discredit and blacken themselves but also are very rude to those who have asked them a favor. You can meet such people everywhere, you know that, looking back at your past. How many times have you been left high and dry? How many people don’t know how to keep a promise? How many times have you been cheated? Do you know what is the most terrible thing in this situation? It is the fact that you are constantly not keeping a promise either.

Why do you break the rule that you should never make a promise you can’t keep? The point is in patterns of behavior that you learn unconsciously from others. The task of a strong personality is to escape from the influence of these patterns. However, this is not easy at least because you do not understand your own mistakes. You say to yourself, “I want to buy a car,” “I want to love this woman all my life,” “I want to learn how to play the saxophone.” You start making plans, which will not be fulfilled in 80% of cases. These are your promises to yourself in addition to a big list of promises that you give to others and do not fulfill too. However, you have surely promised all the things from the heart, but at a turning point, you don’t do anything. So, what’s the problem with a promise to keep?

You do not ponder over the words.

If you think that words are an empty sound, then it will be so. However, whether you like it or not, words form your reality. Language is the way people become aware of the world around them. In terms of promises, this is expressed in irresponsibility, which probably covers all the social strata of the society. However, this does not mean that you should do the same. Try to think about every word you say, this will be your competitive advantage that will clear the way ahead of you.

You fantasize too much.

Wishful thinking is ideal for your peace of mind, but it is absolutely terrible for your life. It is tempting to fantasize about what you will have, forgetting that you need to do the necessary work in order to get that. You cannot learn French without opening a language tutorial or take a course. When you promise something to yourself, you should understand perfectly well what sequence of actions you have to follow in order to fulfill your plans.

You think of “ideals.”

Roughly speaking, if you, by promising to do something, think that you can cope with this promise perfectly, then you deceive yourself. Any task, however petty it may be, involves risks. If you are sure that you will cope with the work 100%, then you are too idealizing your skills, availability of time and also the strength of your desire. You should always have a realistic approach to the promises, and then, perhaps, you will manage to fulfill them more often.

You want to calm a person.

This is the most disgusting kind of a promise, which comes from another “good intention.” For example, you promise to help your girlfriend with her work or study, although you realize that this will require a huge amount of your energy resources. Why are you doing that? Maybe, it happens because you are a good boy who cannot always analyze the situation correctly. Try to notice such “compassionate impulses” in order not to give them power over yourself.

You do not think about problems.

The fact that you are a positive person is wonderful. The problem is that when it comes to promises, the positive helps a little, and you need to think about possible challenges. Just think about the number of problems that will arise at the moment when you make a secret deal. Is it worth it? Or is it better to refuse before you will be called an unreliable person?